which one of u was going to tell me that tea tastes different if u put it in hot water?
y- you were putting it in cold water?????
Radish. Answer the question radish.
yeah??? i thought for like. 5 years that ppl just put it in hot water 2 speed up the tea-ification process didn’t realize there was an actual reason
You dont have the patience to microwave water for 3 minutes???
[ID: Tags reading “u think i have the patience to boil water wtf ?????” /End ID]
why are you. putting it in the microwave to boil it
Do you think I have the patience to boil water on the stove
Its takes less than a minute
Bestie is ur stovetop powered by the fucking sun
How long does it take you to boil a cup of water on the stove
Like seven minutes
Just stick the mug on top of the stove on medium heat n it boils in like two minutes… less than that is u use a saucepan…
Crying you’re putting the whole mug on the stove ???? On medium heat???? Ur stove is enchanted
Every single person in this post is a fucking lunatic
Yet another post that reads like four shakespeare characters who come out in the middle of the play to talk about something completely unrelated for comic relief
(Enter RADISHN’T, MOTHMAN MISATO, BOIMG FROG and CATS'N RAINCOATS, stage left. They are having a HEATED DISCUSSION.)
RADISHN’T: Prithee, which one of you had planned to tell
Of diff'rent flavours gained by simple act
Of brewing tea with water hot, not cold?
MOTHMAN: Egad! you poured the water cold? Wherefore?!
FROG: An answer from you, Radish, I must beg.
RADISHN’T: Indeed I did, dear friends - why does this shock?
Without the guide of others I assumed
That heat was merely added for the sake
Of expediting this solution’s brewing!
Half a decade I have spent, or more,
Not questioning this worldview I had made.
In fact, I am myself a bit surprised
That you might think that I, your dearest friend,
Might have a patience of sufficient stock
To wait until a pot of water boils.
FROG: Three minutes overtaxes patience so?
The microwave will beep when it is done!
CATS'N: My friend, this answer vexes me the more!
Can it be true that thou dost boil by nuke?!
FROG: Are you in turn, my friend, so shocked to know
That I have not the patience, like our Root,
To boil upon the stove our favour’d drink?
CATS'N: It takes less than a minute!
FROG: On what plate?
Perhaps your dinner cooks atop the sun?
CATS'N: How long can take your stove to fill the task
Of boiling but a single cup alone?
FROG: In minutes?
CATS'N: Yes!
FROG: I counted seven, once.
CATS'N: Perhaps you ought to have your timepiece checked!
If on a middle heat you place the cup
You soon will have the scalding drink you crave.
Two minutes, in a mug upon the plate
Or even less, if you should have a pot.
FROG: You cause me tears - is this how thou dost live?
You place upon the iron stove a mug?
A mug, ceramic, filled with water cold?
How do these flames, though medium in height,
Not shatter like a glass this fragile thing?
Surely, then, your kitchen is bewitched
With magicks far beyond the mortal ken!
(The FOUR realise they have wandered into the THRONE ROOM. The ROYAL COURT watches with fascination.)
KING: Ev'ry single person in this group must be a fucking lunatic, it seems.
I’m sorry but the THOUGHT that has been put into this, I actually CAN’T—
The fact that nearly every line is so metrically considered- near perfect iambic pentameter witb the occasional trochee for emphasis, but usually retaining a strong sense of rhythm nonetheless. And then the king comes in at the end, so wound in his disbelief that his response is reduced to prose.
And the even better thing about this is how easy it would have been to structure the king’s line into iambic pentameter: it is effectively already said as such because of the way wizardlyghost has phrased it, yet they haven’t!! They did not break the line, rendering what, by all typically of both Shakespearean canon and other periods context should be the character with the most command and authority in the whole play. If there was ever a more effective way to convey a genuine “what the fuck??”, I know of it not.
But it gets better!! Shakespeare regularly uses meter in order to represent class divide; the nobility usually speak in iambic pentameter, save for a few particularly chosen moments (e.g. Lady Macbeth’s descent into madness, Othello’s realisation of Desdemona’s “betrayal”) or just lines where Shakespeare needs to suggest high emotion or when a character is lost in thought. Supernatural characters like the fairies in A Midsummer Night’s Dream and the Witches in Macbeth usually speak in trochaic tetrameter, an inversion of iambic pentameter. Lower class characters, particularly those used for comic relief (usually under the influence of alcohol), speak with no structure at all: their language is plain prose. Therefore, if this is a conversation between these types of characters, as the prompt from silvergirachi suggests, why the hell are the characters speaking so eloquently???
Now, this is Tumblr. It is subsequently logical to assume that this may have merely been a humorous recreation (and a very good one at that) of the Shakespearean style in a way that is widely recognisable to an audience that may or may not have read a great deal of Shakespeare, which is understandable. However, logic is boring so I’m going to probe further into this to the point where future historians will look to this as an example of overanalysing.
The inherent eloquence of the characters here suggests an unusual subversion of the roles typically assumed in Shakespearean comedy. This could be interpreted along two major avenues: firstly, that the rhetoric displayed by the speakers is fundamentally representative of how truth can be expected even from the most seemingly pointless or ludicrous discussions. Furthermore, it could suggest that it matters not how well constructed your speeches are: if you talk bullshit, it’s going to sound that way despite your attempts to hide it.
This is similar but not identical to the second avenue of interpretation: there is the implication that the noblemen in the play are in fact the comic relief characters, therefore implying that the “common people” of the play are the ones whose influence, though not expressed in such a highly spoken manner, makes a lot more sense than whatever the hell this is. If this was a real Shakespeare play, I would call it a subtle exploration into the innate corruption of the rich and powerful. Well done, op.
Now, I doubt any of this is actually grounded analysis in any way, shape or form, but if someone else can take this to the extremes of writing a Shakespearean scene, why can I not analyse it as such? And where else to do so than Tumblr?
im in tears i didnt think anyone would put this much analysis into this‚ thank you so much
i also like that everyone else gets a version of their handle and then tumblr user pidoop is promoted to king
a war thunder player got so mad about the inaccuracy of an ingame tank they leaked classified british military secrets to prove it’s wrong
Happened AGAIN with China this time
This. This is why any time a conspiracy theory asks you to believe any proposition that requires more than around, oh, call it at MAXIMUM fifty people to maintain perfect secrecy to pull it off, or even SIGNIFICANT secrecy to pull it off, you should be Dubious As Fuck of it.
OpsSec is very difficult actually because humans are fucking ridiculous.
God, anyone else remember when everyone understood that the correct feminist position about sports was that women should be allowed to compete with men because they’re just as capable? When it was a trope in media to have the mysterious star athlete who just blew everyone else out of the water to take off her helmet and reveal that she was a woman the whole time?
Now people are rabidly arguing that supposed “men” (trans women) have inherent insurmountable biological advantages in literally every single possible activity and cis women are too weak and dainty and unskilled to ever compete and must be protected, and then they try to call themselves feminists who are being silenced as if that’s not just the mainstream sexist patriarchal opinion
Anyway, desegregate sports. There was never any reason to separate them by gender in the first place
God, anyone else remember when everyone understood that the correct feminist position about sports was that women should be allowed to compete with men because they’re just as capable? When it was a trope in media to have the mysterious star athlete who just blew everyone else out of the water to take off her helmet and reveal that she was a woman the whole time?
Now people are rabidly arguing that supposed “men” (trans women) have inherent insurmountable biological advantages in literally every single possible activity and cis women are too weak and dainty and unskilled to ever compete and must be protected, and then they try to call themselves feminists who are being silenced as if that’s not just the mainstream sexist patriarchal opinion
Anyway, desegregate sports. There was never any reason to separate them by gender in the first place
the Star Wars universe is great because you read enough you eventually find out things like the fact that the Stormtrooper whose armor Luke stole in Episode IV was gay and in an affair with fucking Grand Moff Tarkin, which is a completely canonical fact that I am not making up.
The next time you watch a New Hope, keep in mind Luke is wearing the armor of a man who knew Tarkin sexually. The armor Luke is wearing when he says the iconic line “I’m Luke Skywalker, I’m here to rescue you” has more than likely been on the floor of Tarkin’s bedroom.
since I’m getting naysayers about this again!
The actual officer whom the trooper is in a relationship goes unspecified within the book, and isn’t listed as Tarkin specifically
However.
The officer is described as; wearing a grey suit, continuously bragging about the strength of the Death Star, and having the highest level of clearance aboard the Death Star, which is how he is able to send secret messages to TK-421
At one point the officer says he won’t be interrogating Princess Leia because Darth Vader will be doing it, meaning he’s definitely high enough in the chain of command to know that about Vader
At one point the officer jokes he just gave an “explosive” demonstration. The story takes place right around the time Alderaan is blown up.
According to someone on Reddit, the Audible version of the story uses Tarkin’s voice for the officer in question
It’s Tarkin.
I have this book and the Audible version and can confirm that nearly every word of this is true (note: the voice is, like, obviously not Peter Cushing, but it’s… pretty clearly Tarkin) except! There is one note here that is ABSOLUTELY incorrect.
That armor has never been on the floor of Tarkin’s bedroom. He is very proud of his carpet and the armor goes on the chair by his bed.
Note: the country hick accent thing is because this is their first in-person meeting and TK-421 thinks Tarkin will be into that.
when i was in fourth grade i was in the gifted program and they let us go to the library more often which meant we had more chances to take the accelerated reader tests and get points and whoever reached a certain threshold got to go to chuck e. cheese so i‘d go around asking ppl i knew had a hard time reading what their logins were and sneak in to take tests for them so they could go to chuck e. cheese too. i got caught and they didn’t let me go to chuck e. cheese but it was worth it fuck you
that’s why we all need to LIE and CHEAT
We love your heroics! We’re gonna deal with whoever caught you.
Imagine a dragon at Antiques Roadshow, appraising its hoard
Imagine the dragon hoards monetarily worthless things like newspapers or old bones and the person appraising it getting more and more nervous about telling the dragon their stuff isnt worth anything
Imagine that the dragon knows this and just likes watching the person squirm.
The dragon actually hoards uncomfortable situations
I just love it when people come up with random weird animal or dragon things and iguanamouth illustrates them just because.
When I was Mormon, the ages for missions were 19 for men and 21 for women.
Before my faith.exe program suddenly crashed, I was doing everything I could think of to keep it running. I knew the church had to be true, and I knew it wasn’t working for me, so I knew there had to be something I needed to change so I could make it work, because it had to work.
When I was 19 my faith finally shut off. Without my permission seemingly all at once I didn’t believe any more. And I couldn’t believe again if I wanted to. Some part of my brain working on the problem without me finally saw the magic trick and it didn’t matter what I wanted to believe anymore, because I couldn’t undo what I knew. And what I knew was that actually it didn’t make any sense and it couldn’t be made to make sense.
A few years later, the church changed mission ages from 19 and 21 to 18 and 19.
And I was like, oh no. Because I am absolutely positive if that had been the case when I was that age, while I was in a furor trying to make the the church work for me, I would’ve absolutely signed up for a mission. In an attempt to get closer to god, to the truth, to inner peace, I would’ve tacked all my hopes in this mission to bring me absolute faith. There’s no way I wouldn’t have jumped at the opportunity.
I don’t know what would’ve happened in that timeline. Maybe I would’ve gotten my endowment and immediately been like “actually, I can’t.” Maybe I would’ve made it to the MTC, but given up before the mission proper. Or maybe I would’ve gone on the mission, married a Mormon man, had Mormon babies, and perpetuated the cycle. I don’t know.
But I do know, whether it only would’ve extended my loyalty to the church by a few months or by years or by my whole life, I would’ve stayed longer. They would’ve retained me by forcing a commitment out of me when I was just barely out of high school.
Now imagine if all that social pressure was also funded by taxpayers and proudly displayed on mainstream tv and film.
I keep seeing people try to dismiss my sympathy and advocacy for veterans by saying “Actually, most recruits aren’t lower class they’re middle class! And actually the greatest predictor of who is recruited is whether their family is also in the military!” As some kind of “gotcha”. And I’m just like.
I mean.
Yeah.
The military is a cult.
Most cults get most of their members by retaining the children of existing members and raising them in the cult. The greatest predictor of whether you will be in a cult is if your parents are.
Stuff about vulnerable populations and poverty only apply to converts. You don’t have to wait for people to be desperate and impressionable if you can get them when they’re kids.
I hadn’t figured out my way out of my cult when I was 18. If I had been expected or encouraged to sign a contract of commitment, I would have. And if breaking that contract was a federal crime? All the more reason not to question it, to protect myself from the repercussions of the answers.
“They’re not victims, they’re just military brats copying their parents” is not the gotcha you think it is.
I can, in fact, still feel sympathy for them, and outrage on their behalf.
The military industrial complex is a machine of imperialism and colonialism and capitalism. The US military is a global terrorist organization. And like most terrorist organizations, it’s a cult. And I have sympathy for cult survivors.
